sad news...

well, i sent out an email about this, but i guess i should update here as well. sadly, i miscarried the baby last week. it was a tough couple of days. it was an emotional roller coaster. i went in on friday due to bleeding and the doctor consoled me and told me that can be normal, i was just really early on and to not worry. but that night and the next day the bleeding got worse. so, i went into urgent care on saturday. on the way there i was thinking it was over, but when i got there the doctor seemed to think things might be ok. while waiting for blood tests results to tell me, i was praying non stop that things would be ok. i had a huge group of people praying for me too. but when i went back in i found out that my hormone levels were really low and had dropped below what they even consider pregnant. i couldn't beleive it, it was such a shock. i was mad i was ever given hope that things might be ok.

after trying for 15 months to get pregnant, i was so surprised that i was. it happened the way michael and i hoped, without fertility medicine. our family and friends were so excited for us, it was so much fun to tell them. it's hard to believe that it's over.

i am so thankful to have makenzie. i know there are so many girls that can't get pregnant ever and miscarry every time they do. my heart aches for them, that would be so hard to handle. it took a long time to get pregnant with makenzie too, and i am thankful i didn't ever miscarry then. because even though i am sad now, i can hug and kiss the baby girl i do have. and if she is the only child i have, i could never be sad. she is more than michael and i could ever ask for, she's perfect.

i'm trying not to ask all of those questions of why, when i could never know the answer. i am just trying to trust in the lord's plan for my life, i dont' know what that will be for us, but i am trusting in him. he has provided everything we've needed and i trust that he will do the same now. and i trust that my heart will heal more each day. so, once again, we will wait on him.

thanks for all your love, support and prayers...

makenzie and aly...

here is a cute video of makenzie and her cousin aly at christmas opening some new earrings. they were such a great age for christmas, love the expressions!

Big News!!!

Now I guess I really should blog a whole lot more. I just found out I'm pregnant!

We are very excited and completely shocked! I am pretty sure I am right about 4 weeks along. I have my first doctor's appointment on February 6th where they will do an ultrasound to see how far along I am exactly! I can hardly wait for that!

Makenzie is quite excited and has been asking about the baby everyday. At first she said it was a boy and a girl in there. I said "i hope not!" and so she changed and she thinks its a girl. We'll see! She will be a great big sister!

So, I will keep this updated with my progress. Please keep us in your prayers!

making a turkey...

i took makenzie to lowe's build and grow clinic today. they put on a little workshop where kids can build something for free 2 times a month. i think thats so awesome, so we tried it out today. it's a little advanced being that makenzie can't really hammer a nail, but she loved it! we made a turkey recipe card holder. then at home i told her she could paint it. she did a great job!

a post i started a month ago...

i wrote this waiting for some pictures from michael of the kids. then i forgot to finish the post...

we went to arkansas for michael's cousin's wedding and makenzie got to see her cousins jake, aly and luke. she loves playing with them. we kinda failed in taking pictures on this trip :(

makenzie and bobby::


on the airplane::


loving being with her cousins::


makenzie, jake and aly...not cooperating very well with us making them take pictures together. turns out they were being eaten by bugs. makenize had about 25 bugs bites on her legs after the 15 minutes of picture taking... oops :)



jake...


aly, who was NOT into michael taking her picture::



makenzie::


one with all 4... jake, aly, makenzie and luke::


playing with daddy in the airport::


a few random pictures::

making a telescope::


painting::


being silly while making pancakes::

makenzie gets her groove on...

last night we went to hayley's house to celebrate this month's family birthdays. we had a wonderful time, i always love spending time with the fam.
summer likes to teach makenzie new things each time she sees her. last night she decided to teach her to dance. i guess since it was 10:00 makenzie was delirious and willing to try anything. i couldn't believe she danced like this for so long, copying summer and everyone else. it was hilarious!!!

here's the first dance with summer...





makenziedancing1 from cn on Vimeo


then they choreographed a dance to put on a show....





makenziedancing2 from cn on Vimeo

then makenzie drew in the crowd....






makenziedancing3 from cn on Vimeo

a day at the zoo...

yesterday makenzie and i met my friend jessica at the la zoo. we had a great time. makenzie enjoyed all the animals, it was alot of fun...

my cute girl...


the prairie dogs..


makenzie and jessica being a prarie dog...


lovely...


makenzie loved watching the monkeys swing...



Monkeys from cn on Vimeo

the giraffes..


makenzie's pretending to have a long tongue like the giraffe


the elephant..




a little video of the elephant bathing...



elephant from cn on Vimeo

the hippos...


we think this may actually be the camel that mary rode to bethlehem...